Hey Bitches!Have you seen this girl?
This is my sister Heather. This is my sister Heather with those two cute cowboys you hoped you might get lucky with after the Loggerodeo.
Sorry!
I know that when they turned down your I-Love-You-thong-wearing-ass you were shocked. Shocked! But the sad truth is that she laid her hands on them first.
And they will never be the same.
See that smile? That's the smile of pure Heather fun. That's the smile of the hostess with the mostess. That's the smile that would have a cowboy willingly cross an open field - in view of all his cowboy friends - carrying her handbag.
So, while your Wet-n-Wild lipglossed mouth was trying to get their attention, they were thinking about that smile.
And when you were making sure that they noticed your oh-so-subtle thong jewelry poking out of your muffin-topped jeans, they were thinking how cute a Jackson Hole t-shirt can look on a slender little body.
She'll be back next year. Fair warning!
3 comments:
Wait, I don't have Mostess. I swear, I just got the test results back last week.
Cowboy Quentin says "All the bitches are at Ccascade Pizza!"
I'm SO living vicariously through this short and sweet romance! IN fact, I made a soundtrack for that fateful night...maybe I'll post the playlist to my blog. I never really thought that I would be in a place, tromping around in horse dung, and hearing the phrases:
'Hey Gary, I'll go pick up our checks' (RODEO Winnings for Christ Sakes!)&
'Those calfs l' be on the tit all night'
It doesn't get ANY kewler than that...I really just about melted.
AND...the image of that sweet cowboy, walking across the night field, stars in the sky, silhouetted by the glare of headlights, carrying a handbag, and leaning over the bob wire (I know it's barbed, but it sounds better) and saying in his cowboy accent (where did he get that accent?, being from Port Orchard n'all?)...'Is Heather still there?)...Well, it's just enough to make a girl go weak in the knees.
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