Thursday, November 13, 2008

What goes on? Benevolent Dictators.

Max is all smiles... maybe Thomas is napping?

This blog is in danger of being renamed CarrollBrothers: Shameless Self Promoters! Lord knows, they are that. All smiles and kissey faces for all the people they meet.

All gremlinish for Mommy, when she is trying to get them to sleep.

Not much goes on here. I am trying to get the boys sleeping through the night. They inch closer and closer to it - sometimes even alternating sleeping through, but then we go to Vermont or someone doesn't take a nap... or Daddy decides that because someones eyes are open at 10 pm, they should come hang out with us... and we back pedal to waking at 3 am.

Sorry to dwell on it, but I never imagined how much sleep would dictate the quality of my existence.

Plus, I am imagining the impending doom of our trip to Seattle. Babies are resilient, it's true. And the boys will be all good times and cheer - even if they wake up 4 times a night. Hey, strollers and slings are great places to nap if you are 8 months old.

It's me who will suffer, and I am not all that resilient anymore. Almost nine months without a full nights sleep (more if you consider the last months of my pregnancy when I had to wake to rotate my 52 cm belly) has left me far from resilient.

I'm sending Euge to Vermont again this weekend, to attempt to get the roof finished on his shed. There is just too much time and money invested in that thing to let it get more corroded this winter.

I'll be alone in the city with the boys but, since I have so many resources in the city that I don't have up there, it is far preferable to going along.

Plus, as I mentioned before, every time we go there the boys get all confused all over again about where they are and the whole sleeping thing takes a step backwards.

I'll think of Barb a lot this weekend and how very brave I think she is to be doing the Mommy thing alone. I'll think of all the weekends when I slept in until ten and then meandered to brunch or the gym. I'll remember the freedom of being able to go out to dinner or drinks with friends or out to a movie... or just to take the subway to a museum by myself. And I may have a little momentary pity party.

But then, in the quiet of the evening... around 8 pm, when the boys are settled for the first leg of their night, I'll wander in to their room to check on them and these are the sights that will greet me:

And my heart will get all filled with squishy love and I will forget about going out dinner, out for drinks, out to a movie.

Hopefully, when we are visiting you all will feel the same way - since we will be pretty much tied to whatever schedule the boys dictate.


Barb said...

Ahhh the joys of sleeping babies. When I went in to wake Sam at 7am this morning he was sleeping with his little bear-covered butt right up in the air. So cute I hated to wake him. I know what you mean about the lack of sleep. For me, right after Sam's 6 month checkup in which his pediatrician said he didn't need to nurse at night and I could let him cry for a long time, I let Sam cry it out for one night. Forty minutes later he was sound asleep, and ever since then he's been really good at just soothing himself back to sleep when he wakes at night. I know you get tons of unsolicited advice from everyone and every single baby is different, but that's how I manage to get sleep as a single mommy. I let him cry. And trust me, at some point you have to get used to that because when they start feeding themselves and don't like you doing anything for them, they cry a lot more. If I could wish for one thing (other than more sleep) it would be an end to the noise. Or maybe just an hour without it.

Not that I'm complaining. :)

Good luck this weekend. My advice? go to bed when they do. :)

LadyGripe said...

Oh, I let have let them cry. It has mixed results. Sometimes it works and they sleep heavily after. Sometimes they just egg each other on.

Think one crying baby is unpleasant? Two is exponentially more fun!

I try to go to bed earlier (though not at 6 - like them - unless it is just a nap) but I also have to retrain myself from waiting to hear them wake up! I basically just lay there waiting to hear them.

It's kind of pathetic really. ;-)

Barb said...

That's hilarious. And not at all pathetic. I know the feeling.

LadyGripe said...

They slept through the night last night! Both of them! Wheee!

Anonymous said...

Okay, tired Mama. When you get to Seattle, I intend to be the person who encourages you enjoy time with your Seattle friends- movies, drinking, dancing in the moonlight, whatever (including sleeping 8 hours!)! I don't have the Granny job often, but this is a good opportunity to do it up however works for you. So, try to stop worrying about it. I'm resiliant and well rested! These little sleepyheads art so sweet. I want to reach into the blog and scoop them up. Thank you for taking the time to post!

Dakota said...

Any luck with 'Joseph's Favorite Lullabies'?...the thought was that they could listen going to sleep at your house, and then when you visit, at our house so they feel at home :)...