So Many Happy Birthdays

Heather, Eugene & Allison at E&A's wedding

Meet my brother-in-law, Eugene. You may have seen his photo on this blog before. For those of you who haven't had the good fortune to meet him in person, let's see what I can do to give you a mental picture of this man.

Ahem. Allison, brace yourself. No, I'm kidding. Here's the thing. People in Seattle, they tend to be pretty polite. Polite to the point of being uptight sometimes, polite to the point where it sometimes inhibits real connection.

Eugene doesn't have that problem. Eugene is out there. All the crudeness, all the potty humor, with the uncanny ability that you typically only find in young children, to ask those types of questions that are obvious, but that everyone else might choose to avoid. Like, asking a woman "Are you cold?", when certain, shall we say, anatomical evidence presents itself. This question might be followed by the comment "Damn girl! Turn those headlights down!". It's true. This could happen to you. Don't go for the soft-cup bra around Eugene.

And here's the truth that mom may not want to acknowledge about her baby daughter. Ali? She can be pretty crude too. For real. The fact is, Eugene cracks Ali up. Even when he's being gross. I can hear her laughing at him right now, that kind of laugh where she has a hard time getting her breath, and her brow wrinkles up a little like she's going to cry. Maybe she doesn't go for the headlight comment, but she will tell you about her food baby.

But Eugene's sweetness is also out there too. He's totally a softie. A foul-mouthed, sometimes smelly, Queens-accented sweetheart. He's a tender brute, and some of you might know that it's my firmly held belief that what every woman really wants is a tender brute. Eugene's tenderness is very obvious with my sister, who has never had a sweeter boyfriend. She did marry the right one. She knows it, he knows it, and no one has to pretend any different.

To me, it seems like a rare thing, two people loving each other equally. Usually all of us know that there's some imbalance in a relationship. I wouldn't claim that Allison and Eugene were always perfectly in balance, but they are now. They both wear the pants in the family, and neither of them pretend to be anything other than what they are. I've seen them argue in that loud, uncomfortable way that makes you wonder if you've suddenly become part of the furniture, and then be holding hands and grinning two minutes later. I like to think of them as a bomb-proof kind of couple. I hope the years will prove me right.

Their wedding... oh, you should have been at their wedding. We made a lot of jokes about Allison being Bridezilla, because you would not believe the level of detail that went into the planning of that event. It seemed like there was no possible way that Allison was going to be the serene bride, because there were so many things that could have gone wrong. Amazingly, she was. Look at the photo above, you can see it in her smile. She was a happy, happy bride.

But the great thing about the wedding was that while it was just as elegant as it looks in the classy photo above, it was also as ridiculos as it looks in the photo below. Someone is dropping F-bombs on the shuttle while he sits next to someone's mom, Glenn's probably getting left behind because he's making out with someone in the bushes, and you can see me on the left with the ever-present Polaroid. We got some good Polaroids that night. It was, hands-down, the most fun wedding I have ever been to. Oh, how I misbehaved. That's always a sign that I'm having a good time. Benevolent misbehavior. But that's another entry...

Back to Eugene. He gets credit for making my sister so happy that nothing could go wrong for her on her wedding day. He also get credit for being level-headed, no-nonsense and loyal as they come. Over the past few years, I've come to think of Eugene as one of the many benefits of being part of my family. There will be no boring holidays with Eugene in town. Furthermore, things will get done. Lightbulbs changed, etc. Hey Euge, maybe you could hang some pictures at my place when you're there for Thanksgiving?

Eugene, if I haven't said it before, I love you like a brother. We're lucky to have you as a part of the family, and my sister is lucky to have you as a husband. I can think of few better couples. As I said at your wedding, you two are the same kind of nerd.

And if anyone doubts that at all, just check out that pic of them in the Star Trek get-ups.

Happy Birthday, Eugene. Looking forward to having you around for many more.